bj's gay porno-crazed ramblings

Friday, December 31, 2004

it's not exactly a hangover, but i am definately sluggish today. which is fine. 3 or four beers, some weed, and cigarette inhaling at the Cock, was a fun night. tonight, perhaps i will pace myself better - any locals - remember to stop by NOWHERE (see ad/invite below) - you wear the jockstrap, i'll do the sniffing.

to the rest of you, have a safe and happy holiday!




Thursday, December 30, 2004
dildo challenge?


Always a tad suspicious of spin-offs, but this idea - the DILDO CHALLENGE - looks promising. Inspired by the successful Parade Of Jocks, this is one that, alas, I can't participate in. Nope, never had one of these. I guess I was never much up for trying one out. Being the ORAL TYPE, the thought of a thick slab of plastic in my mouth just never seemed too appetizing. Of course, as I am about to descend into my annual hibernation, maybe it's time to expand my, er, horizons. Of course, I'd only do it with Aiden.




Wednesday, December 29, 2004

Was out last night with my pal Andy, and while at BIG LUG ran into another buddy, Pete, who confirmed that he and my pal JEFF will be dee-jaying at NOWHERE this Friday, New Year's Eve. WOO-HOO! And when I got home last night, the above reminder/invite was in my email box. Of course I knew where they nabbed the picture from, it's MUNICH MACHINE's album cover for Whiter Shade of Pale - which I wrote about, gee, 3 years ago cuz their version of the song is used prominently in William Higgins's The Boys of Venice. Was this going anywhere? Oh, probably just happy to know there's a local place with friends to celebrate New Years with. Oh, and we ran into a handsome couple, who said they might also pop in for a drink Friday - one of whom agreed with me that cockrings and jockstraps would be appropriate attire. I guess you'll have to show up and check trousers to see which one of these boys said it. Believe me, I'll pretend not to remember so I'll have the excuse to trouser-check!

and check out these Munich Machine tunes:




Tuesday, December 28, 2004
Just flew back from Chicago (and boy are my arms tired...), amazingly trouble-free and quick return trip. Happy to be back, happy to have seen the relatives - but goooood GOD that friggin' city is cold! I hate wearing three layers of clothes IN DOORS, as well as in bed. Time for some errands, then a nap, then work this evening. Might make it to BIG LUG.



Friday, December 24, 2004
MERRY XXXMAS

- and dress warm!




Thursday, December 23, 2004
I'm not complaining.......but,
he said he wasn't going to sleep over. But I did offer, and it was sometime after 4 a.m., and I 'finished up' (he urged me not to wait for him) but he didn't. He said he really needed to get home; he had some last minute shopping to do before taking a bus upstate. So just a few minutes of snuggling before he headed out. But before I knew it I was sound asleep, and he was planted right in the middle of the bed - both arms outstretched, and each leg as well. When I woke and tried to maneuver the guy, I realized he was sound asleep, and a much bigger fellow than I had remembered. Dangling half off the bed, his elbow in my side and knee digging into my thigh, the snoring began. Awww, man! I'd push him slightly, he'd stop for all of 7 seconds, then start again - slow and quiet at first, then longer louder snorts of snoring. A bigger push, a longer pause in the snoring - but it would return as soon as my eyelids closed. More pushes, more pauses, then more snoring. A big big push, and finally he stopped. Phewwww.

I was just getting back to sleep, but I felt this slight motion in the bed. He's jerkin off. Cool - he'll take care of that, then be able to sleep. I feel the vibration of his body as he lies next to me whackin'. But then he reaches over, and grabs my cock. Ouch! Owwww, what the - he's grabbed my cock and begun to jerk it, but with just two fingers, like tweezers clamping down on the head. I'm thinking: JEEEEE-SUS!!! STOP THAT! - but my body language is not at all loud, I just quickly turn over, burying my cock in the mattress and turning my bare ass towards him. I can't tell what he's doing now, but he isn't tweezering my cock anymore, and then one hand rests on my ass. I think he's given up.

I fall back asleep, until suddenly I hear his voice - "I gotta get going" - he's smiling, standing over the bed, nearly completely dressed. I smile back, bury my face in the pillow again, and he says something, I dunno what. I look up, he's completely dressed and opening the bedroom door. I get up, follow him into the cold kitchen, standing there in just my jock as he grabs his coat, puts it and a hat on. We kiss, I wish him a happy holiday, safe trip, all that, and walk him to the door. The door shuts, I crawl back into bed, luxuriating in its new vastness.




Wednesday, December 22, 2004
Et tu, Bruno?


Looks like everyone (but me) has a profile on bigmusclebears.com - even one of my favorite 70's pornstars! Note to losers still using Internet Explorer (IE) as your browser - Get FIREFOX! Some would tell you it's the better security, some would tell you it's all about the "tabbed browsing" - blah , blah, blah, ZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzz.....

But seriously, the best reason is that those annoying little pop-ups preventing you from saving pictures to your harddrive ("please do not copy images from BigMuscle.Com", etc) still pop-up, but don't work on FIREFOX! Not that I'm saying I have some huge filefolder with tons of saved pics from that site.... but just in case you want to do it, do it now, before the techie guys start working on putting in code like that to work on this new 'hot" browser.




Tuesday, December 21, 2004
Santa wears a jockstrap (and tube socks)
Navy Blue


"Would you like to put something in Santa's chimney?"

directed by: Francis Ellie (1979)

Starring: George Payne and Brian Ray (Santa) - this scene; also stars Jack Wrangler, Giuseppe Welsh (helicopter), Adam DeHaven, Kurt Mann, Snapper Foster, Derek Thurston, and Anna Freed

OK, despite quality concerns (which I was not able to overcome) I figured it was better to have a not-so-good pornoSanta clip than none at all. Hope you agree. The film itself has many memorable scenes - the blowjob in the helicopter flying over Manhattan is my personal favorites; but the Jack Wrangler finding George Payne under the Xmas tree with a big, red BOW (and the appropriate disco music and Xmas lights) fantasy scene is also pretty cool. This one finds George wandering around Manhattan, stumbling upon a Santa raising money for charity (not to worry, it's not a Salvation Army Santa, so you can enjoy guilt-free) who uses several awful double entendres to pick up sexy sailor George Payne.




rats! sorry guys, but I can't get the video to record properly, so there may well be no clip today (or at all from the movie I was hoping to use - Navy Blue with George Payne) - can't tell if it's the recording program, the old videotape (source) or my clunky old computer.



Monday, December 20, 2004
naughty or nice?
looks like Santa is working hard trying to figure that out with this un-credited model. My guess is that it's 80's/90's model Chris Onassis (who you may remember from such movies as Muscle Fever, Low Blows and The Bigger They Come - which also stars an even hotter CHRIS - Chris Grey, but I digress). I hoping to post a holiday clip tomorrow - but just to warn you long-time readers, it is a repeat from 2 years ago. The good news is that the quality will be better, and because of the generosity of my webhosting company, DREAMHOST, the length will be longer (who doesn't like that!) - enough to fit in the silly campy part, as well as some holidaybuttfucking, for those of you into that sort of thing. (and if you look closely enough, you'll see that even Santa wears a jockstrap - mmmmmmmmmmmmm, jockstraps..... speaking of jockstraps - looks like THE PARADE OF JOCKS is taking off, so to speak!)



Sunday, December 19, 2004



miscellllaneous holiday crap





Saturday, December 18, 2004



Friday, December 17, 2004
A pal of mine is trying to get a "Parade of Jocks" going - either you post a pic of yourself on your own webpage in your jockstrap, or you send one (a pic, that is - but chances are he'll accept jockstraps, too) to Chas. C'mon! DO IT!



COOL STUFF FOR PEOPLE WITH MONEY


Sometimes I really wish I was a "serious collector, scholar or archivist" - with money! Check this auction out for a bundle of vintage DER KREIS magazines from the 50's and 60's - with contributors such as Paul Cadmus, Platt Lynes, Stefan George, Don Wight, George Quaintance and physique photographers Bob Mizer (Athletic Model Guild), Don Whitman (Western Photography Guild), and Chuck Renslow (Kris of Chicago). Believe me, I haven't a clue, really, what this is, but it's just so cool imagining having this collection of 83 issues and discover more cool (gay-ish) shit from the past, don't ya think?




Thursday, December 16, 2004
Something bout the smell of jocktraps cornbread
two disturbing realizations from the past 24 hours. One is that I need to be more careful when someone asks for porno-movie background music. That dang Charlie Pride song - Wonder Could I Live There Anymore - (posted below) was dancing in my head all last night at work, I COULD NOT STOP HUMMING IT. And then I rushed home to listen to it (OK, OK, maybe i got a pint of ice cream at the Key Food first; but as soon as I got home, I put it on heavy rotation). It's really good!

Then, looking over blogs and such last night and this morning, the disturbing news that there are actually gay men who don't own jockstraps! I dunno, this sounds like a project for 2005 - matching up jockless gayboys with those of us who have plenty to share. Will need to give that one some thought.




Wednesday, December 15, 2004
It's nice to think about it, maybe even visit
So, back to the music from El Paso Wrecking Corp., after several folks helped out identifying the tunes used in that scene I posted the other day, I figured I should try to locate, and of course, post what I could. The first tune we hear in that scene appears to be Bill Monroe's I'm On My Way Back To The Old Home - I wasn't able to find a copy of his version, but here's another, by J.D. Crowe, Tony Rice, and Doyle Lawson. Kinda cool, if you listen to the lyrics, which include:

"Soon my childhood days are over
I had to leave my old home
For dad and mom was called to heaven
We'll I'm left in this world all alone"

(Except, of course, he's not all alone - there's another man with a hard cock sitting in his car with him) At first I didn't realize there was another tune, until I tried to confirm that my first emailer was correct about Bill Monroe (btw - thanks, man!) and realized another song fills out the end of the scene. This song is even better - Bill Rice's "I Wonder Could I Live There Anymore," recorded by Charley Pride - in a sort of thematic way, if you will. More wistful lyrics about the old days, childhood; but again, the realization there's no turning back -

"As I think about my childhood and of my old hometown
I don't really miss them like before
It's nice to think about it maybe even visit
but I wonder could I live there anymore"

no, buddy, once you've whacked off with your best friend, urging you to cum with him, there's no turning back. nope. no way.


------- thanks to all the guys who wrote in helping get these songs identified!!!!




Tuesday, December 14, 2004
You're OUT!
What sounds like yet another bad christians doing un-Christian things story - Gay Teen Expelled From High School (from Ryan Davis/Notgeniuses.com) - to me sounds like a good old fashioned inspirational story. You really ought to go read the entire story, since I'm only going to skim over it - and there's a helluva lot of discussion over at DAILY KOS on this, as well. Basically, this 18-year-old was confronted by his high school principal about being gay, after they learned he ran a gay-teen website. The guy wasn't yet out to his parents, and begged the principal not to tell them. Upset parents, angry school, kid gets expelled. It sucks, of course. But what fascinates me is the kid, and the making of his website. Apparently, he saw a need for a safe place for gay teens to go online and deal with issues surrounding their sexuality, after the place he'd normally turn to started charging money. Using his own talents and resources, he created a new website. The school found about it, and that's where his troubles began.

Obviously, there are tons of issues here - what rights do teens have to their privacy; what rights to private schools have to decide who, and who not, to allow in their school; parent/child relationships; how tough it is, even today, to be a gay teen; and of course, a favorite - OUTING. Personally, as anyone may have gathered from reading my pages, I do not believe that any politician has a "right to privacy" in terms of their sexual orientation - I say OUT THE BASTARDS, and let the public sort it out. Celebrities? Well, I could give a rat's ass about their rights - but it would be more accurate to say I just am tired of hearing about ANYTHING a celebrity says or does. This isn't 1991; I don't think there is this big need to have OUT gay actresses, actors, newsmen, etc. It's not a bad thing, don't get me wrong - I just don't think it's an important thing. I think the turnaround for me happened during the whole "gay marriage" debate - when Rosie O'Donnel got married in San Francisco. I didn't care much for her either way until she took on the "gay adoption" issue, and I thought she had some great things to say, and brought some good publicity to the cause. But the marriage issue was the turning point. Here she never (as far as I saw) spoke about other people - it was all about the rights she didn't have being in an UNACKNOWLEDGED relationship. She wasn't wrong - but she wasn't convincing because she just never made the case that I wanted her to make - "I'm a rich and powerful woman - I can do what I damn well please, and have tons of lawyers looking out for my interests, both professionally and personally. But as I learned in a recent court case, I am denied rights that any married partner has. And I've got money and lawyers coming out of my ass! What about the regular folks struggling to make ends meet, or who don't have health care, or custody rights, or any of those other things that I, and many of you, take for granted." Blah blah blah. But that never happened, and it won't. It can't.

So I prefer to concentrate on real heroes, real, "regular" gay people who make life better for us - who move "the cause" forward. And that is why this kid's story fascinates me. I want to hear about more folks who see some inequity, some need being unmet, and take their talents, ideas, skills and do something positive with it. An 18-year-old in a so-called Christian school took a big risk - and at the moment it might be very scary for him. But he couldn't help trying to make a difference for other gay kids who merely needed a place to go, talk, be themselves, feel safe. We owe it to folks like this to show our support, our gratitude, and for me anyway, my awe.




got home about 20 minutes ago. was ready to throw in the towel last night, but for no reason decided to have just one more beer. if they didn't have to get to work this morning, i would no doubt still be in (their) bed. it's funny how uncomfortable sleeping between two men is, and yet how amazingly well the feeling of warm fur on either side of you more than compensates. and they were both great kissers; even this morning as I forced myself out so they could dress and get ready for work. i think it is safe to say that was the last sex I will have in 2004.

time to crawl under my covers for a few hours - don't wake me unless you're packin' fur.




Monday, December 13, 2004

drinking and

Saturday night was fun. Was hanging out with some friends at a bar (one of them was dj-ing) and after 2 beers, knew it was time to go. But as I was leaving, several other friends showed up, and with all that arm-twisting ("OK, see ya later"), I decided to stay a bit longer. Two men listened patiently as I told of old eBay sales and other eBay underwear salesmen ("and thish other guy, heesh always with the bulging crotcheses and no pubes, canyabelieveit?"), then tried to leave. But I followed them out, more stories as they tried to run faster.

But, the good news is that I seem to be able to hold me liquor better these days. Even though I described my "vintage" mesh Tru-Fit jockstrap I was wearing, I never actually unbuttoned my Levis to show them (perhaps it was the pleading look in their eyes). Of course, tonight is the company holiday party, and with all that free liquor, who knows. More important tonight is the COCK's 6th Anniversary party, which won't get going til after 1 a.m. - I only hope I don't inhale too much beer at the earlier party - I want to be able to ride the bike. No guarantees about me keeping my Xmas-red jockstrap out of public view, though. You've been warned!






Subj: hi
Date: 12/13/04 4:35:23 AM Eastern Standard Time
From: XXXXXX@caramail.com
To: bjland7820@aol.com

hello!
i'd like to work in the porn industry.
my name is cedric
i'm 24.
please contact me if you have a solution.

thanks



Saturday, December 11, 2004
It ain't done yet, but I often start these little projects, get about 60% done, then it gets set aside for months (or forever). Let this be a warning to you, kids; don't smoke pot! It does terrible things to your brain, makes you forgetful, unable to focus, and, and, er, oh yeah, there's that other thing about sex drive, which, well, I wish would kick in soon! Maybe I'd get more done. Anyway, if you remember, I had asked, and got several responses, on how to make a "sortable list" so it would be easier to view my collection - so here it is, that updated pornovideo list I mentioned a few weeks ago.

It still needs work, like I haven't figured out what to do with the COLT and BULLET (Target Studios) stuff - since they are essentially collections of short films that might vary in actual release dates. Same thing with a few old FALCONS I have. But I did finally figure out, with a reasonable degree of certainty, the release year for Falcon Video Pac 1 - The Other Side of Aspen - 1978. Apparently, they were about to get into the videotape market, and this new hot film was going to be the first release, along with the usual 8mm/Super 8mm, plus Super 8mm sound films (Falcon films #637-640) in 4 parts; plus two magazines, Ski Summit - part I and II. After that , it's a bit more difficult to figure out the actual production/release dates, as they then went through their catalogue of films to put out on video, as well as continuing to produce new films that were also released on video. So between the 3 studios, there might be another 20 tapes on hand that I haven't yet included on the list. So if you see typos, or other errors, feel free to let me know. And someday, I might even get around to fixing it.

update: RATS! f**kin' RATS! it ain't workin - not in Internet Explorer or Firefox. WTF?

4 a.m. Sunday morning update: - woo-hoo! thaks to the man from New Zealand!! looks like it works after his easy easy easy instructions (i've had four beers, drooled while talking to a married man, and am now about to have more ice cream, but his "make this directory, put this file in there" directios somehow penetrated my inebriated sex-starved mind) - lemme know if y'all hae problems.




Friday, December 10, 2004
rufftrade

Another eBay seller, rufftrade; he didn't last long, but he left a lasting impression on my


hard drive.




Code3stud - WTF???
(I had typed this up yesterday, Thursday, and planned to post it last night, but...)

Years back, friends of mine would tease me about all the AOL chatboy pics, and eBay underwearboy pics I'd save on my hard drive (all the while hogging the chair at the computer - laughing at some, drooling at others). So last February, at work, reading the GAY CITY NEWS story on Code3stud, I knew I had pics on the old hard drive, but had forgotten to write about it until this week, when the story re-appeared with the Supreme Court decision. When I posted about it (below) the same friends weren't surprised i had pics of the guy, but only that I was able to locate them on this jam-packed machine. And today, obsessively checking referrals, I see that (at the moment, anyway) I am top of GOOGLE'S SEARCH for Code3stud! Sometimes hard work pays off.

As of last night, nowhere to be found! Sometimes GOOGLE acts in mysterious ways, I guess. Now, of course, wouldn't it be cool to locate one of the (in)famous videos??!




Thursday, December 09, 2004
male bonding
EL PASO WRECKING CORP.

"Maybe we oughta try a little hand work."

I'm sure this has happened to you. You're hanging out with your best buddy, you've had a few beers, and you're sitting in your car in front of some queer joint (apparently the only bar in town), horny as all heck. You just can't take it any more, so one of you suggests you whack off. Together. Not to worry, neither of you dares touch the other guy; it's just to relieve a little stress - nothing like what those guys inside that there bar do.

This clip is the Parking Lot scene from El Paso Wrecking Corp., directed by: Joe Gage (1977); starring: Jim (Aaron Taylor) and Wayne (Robert Snowden). Now, if you're not into watching two guys with nice cocks whack off for a few moments, no problem. I'm actually posting this cuz I've had a request to figure out what the music is that's playing in the background. Some sort of country music (maybe blue grass is more accurate?) that I can't make head nor tails out of; and remember, it's got to be from 1977 or before. Any help is appreciated; bad guessing is better than no guessing at all.




Wednesday, December 08, 2004
So, here I am trying to type out a brief post on how I could use some FOCUSIN cuz I can't seem to get anything done around here, attempting a bunch of projects (making a dvd, doing laundry, readying some packages for the post office, a porno clip with a "please help identify the background music" component, and, well, i forgot the other stuff) simultaneously and getting nowhere on any of them. I figured a link to the Simpsons reference would be in order, but now I am lost in a sea of Simspsons websites! Who knew there was one dedicated to Grandpa Simpson?



Tuesday, December 07, 2004
City of San Diego et al v. Roe

The Department became aware of Roe's activities on eBay through the following sequence of events. In July 2000, Roe's supervisor, Sergeant Robert Dare, searched eBay and located a tan uniform formerly used by the San Diego Police Department. The uniform was offered for sale by a person with the eBay username "Code3stud@aol.com."

Sgt. Dare searched eBay for other items offered for sale by Code3stud and discovered there were such items in eBay's adults-only section. After complying with eBay's access requirements, Sgt. Dare entered the adults-only section and viewed the listings for the items offered by Code3stud. Some of the listings contained Code3stud's picture, and Sgt. Dare recognized the man pictured as Roe.

"Pecs like that you don't forget easily," Dare said. "And he was always horsing around the locker room doing that damn 'Egyptian' dance. And when he'd grab his cock and shake it at you, the veins on his hand would pop out just so, I knew it was him," Dare continued.

Sgt. Dare printed out some of the listings and shared them with other supervisors in Roe's chain of command, including Captain Glenn Breitenstein. After gathering several other officers in his office for a hardy circle jerk while passing around the photos, Capt. Breitenstein contacted the Department's Professional Standards Unit ("PSU"), which began an investigation into Roe's activity on eBay. On July 21, 2000, an undercover PSU investigator, Sergeant Alan Clark, purchased two items from Code3stud: a pair of white men's briefs and a videotape depicting Roe engaging in masturbation. On September 7, Sgt. Clark, again acting undercover, asked Code3stud to produce a custom-made videotape depicting Code3stud issuing another man a citation and then masturbating. Code3stud agreed, produced the video and sold it to Sgt. Clark.

"The guys in the department went wild when I brought the tape in - I swear we must've been in the Captain's office for hours jerking off," said Clark. "I don't think I've whacked off that much since I was a teenager! I mean, this guy has an ass that won't quit - it's hard as a rock! A few of the guys even, er, um, helped each other out, if you know what I mean."

On October 17, 2000, Sgt. Clark interviewed Roe in person about his sale of videos and clothing on eBay. Unbuttoning his trouser's and revealing the Fruit-of-the-Loom's Clark had purchased on eBay, Roe readily admitted to the off-duty conduct. "Damn, Sarge! You fill them out even better than me. I've seen you in the locker room before, but apparently, you're a grower!" Sgt. Clark completed his investigation on November 30 (6 weeks later), and concluded that Roe had violated three Department policies: Policy 9.06 -- Unbecoming Conduct, Policy 9.07 -- Immoral Conduct, and Policy 5.12 -- Selling Underwear on eBay without letting the rest of the boys get in on the action. On December 20, 2000, Capt. Breitenstein ordered Roe "to cease displaying, manufacturing, distributing or selling any sexually explicit materials or engaging in any similar behaviors, via the internet, U.S. Mail, commercial vendors or distributors, or any other medium available to the public."

Roe removed all items he had listed for sale on eBay but did not change his seller's profile, which described the first two videos he had produced and listed their prices, as well as the price for a custom-made video. On February 13, 2001, Sgt. Dare submitted a report concluding that Roe had violated a fourth Department Policy 9.04 -- Obedience to Lawful Orders -- and recommended disciplinary action. After providing Roe with notice and a hearing, the Department terminated Roe's employment on June 29, 2001 for violation of all four Department policies. The Supreme Court had expected to hand down it's ruling in October, but Justices Thomas and Souter were still reviewing the tapes until this past Friday.

.......

While I'm sorry the guy lost his job and all, you can't imagine how jealous I am! I mean, how many naughty eBay sellers make it all the way to the Supreme Court, fer chrissakes! For any lawdorks out there - some background on the case prior to it reaching the Supreme Court: Arthur S. Leonard's excellent article, and of course the 9th Circuit's opinion.



Monday, December 06, 2004
EARS!

EARS! isn't the first thing I think of when I see this gaypunkhardcoreguitarist's pics. But I could see spending some time chewing on his...... EARS! if that's what floats his boat. (link via gregunderwater)




Sunday, December 05, 2004
feet

I don't love 'em; I don't hate 'em.




come back to bed
you pleaded, in that sweet way you have. I relented, even though I needed to get ready for work - just a few minutes of cuddling couldn't hurt. You grabbed me tight, "spooning" me from behind, your furry chest pressed hard against my back, your lips pressed hard against the back of my neck. Your arms wrapped around me, forearms just above my belly; slightly engorged, you playfully poked at my bare ass, kissing my ears as I drifted back to sleep.

What seemed like hours later was just a few minutes, as I suddenly awoke, looked at the clock, jumped out of bed in a panic, knowing I will now be late. Looking back into the bed, suddenly sad. Gone. You've been gone for years.




Friday, December 03, 2004
COME OF AGE


"You will squirm with pleasure when you see COME OF AGE"

directed by: PAT ROCCO (but credited to Brad Kingston) (1971)

Starring: Ron Durango, Mark Taylor, Tom Winston, Ralph Martin

another one from Jaguar Films which got re-released in 1999, then pulled from the market again a couple years ago) that I happen to have posted to eBay (along with another Jaguar film, Four, More Than Money.








Who wants to see the trailer for the other JAGUAR video I've got up for auction?





hot daddies (and boy wonders)
I realize that constant plugging of the handful of adult auctions I have might be a tad annoying, but don't leave just yet. I just got good news from my webhosting company, DREAMHOST - they have just TRIPLED the monthly bandwidth allotments!!!! (and woo-hoo! I just noticed that I've earned $11.94 from BOY WONDER - ain't webreferraldollars cool?) So my good news is your good news - for you non-website-owning folks, here's a translation - MUCHO MORE MUSIC FILES, HIGHER QUALITY/BIGGER PICS, MUCHO MORE VIDEO CLIPS!!!! - like a few pics from a magazine I'm selling (2 days left to bid!) - HOT DADDIES.

Did I say MUSIC FILES? Here's a little something with our pal, Dan Rather.




Thursday, December 02, 2004
Jesus's Message of Love BANNED From Network TV Just Prior To Christmas!
being one of those obsessive gaynews junkies, I am always interested in HOW a story is reported. I am sure many of you now know about the new GAY CONTROVERSEY - the TV ad that a Christian Church produced promoting it's "inclusiveness" that subtley showed gay couples, and not-so-subtley tries to distinguish itself from other churches. Just reading the healdlines below, you can see what to me are striking differences (or do you own GOOGLENEWS SEARCH and see the array of headlines) in the coverage.

Now, if I were an advocate for inclusiveness, or religious freedom, or free speech, or broadcast networks resposibility to the public, I would use that last one - who wouldn't be outraged that NETWORKS BAR RELIGIOUS COMMERICAL - of course, I prefer my own slightly less subtle headline, above.


see the commercial for yourself here

take the CNN "QUICKPOLL"




Wednesday, December 01, 2004

eighty-sixed
this is not the copy of the book I bought a few weeks after meeting David. (he was horrified to see a stack of these some years later in the bargain bin, and bought up the whole stack!) But I remember him being genuinely surprised that I didn't know he was an "award-winning" author - the way he said it was in quotes, too - just so I knew he didn't take himself so seriously. I secretly bought the book a few weeks later, not wanting him to know, in case I hated it. But of course, I gobbled it up, reading it in about 2 days. We weren't best friends, but we were good ACT UP buddies; sitting together at meetings, on bus rides to demonstrations, in "affinity groups" together, that sort of thing. The first time we slept together was one of those multiple demonstrations days, and we had just finished yelling at Al D'Amato's office for about an hour. His apartment was nearby, and he invited me over for a shower and blueberries. This was the closest we got to sex; it never actually happened, even though friends of mine (including a boyfriend later) would tease me about it relentlessly. We made out a bit, fed each other blueberries, and then, surprisingly, took separate showers. Then he confronted the issue - sex - saying my having a boyfriend made him hesitate, and maybe we shouldn't, but can't we just cuddle up and take a nap. You can't imagine a better man to hold while napping.

He would send me postcards from out of town when he was doing his book tours, and even post cards when he was in town, as he knew how much I loved them. And there would always be some flirtatious line, like "Marry Me" and then, in smaller print, in parentheses - "we don't have to do "IT" - do we?" With all the fun and flirting, and scary moments during arrests and the awful boredom of dealing with courts and lawyers later, we never became close enough for him to take out his anger at having the disease on me, like he did towards his closest friends. In October of '94, he called me. He had been in and out of the hospital a lot over the past couple months, he sounded terrible, and he asked me to come right over. By the time I got over by cab, he was fine; he had gotten either terribly hot or terribly cold, and a nurse talked him through what to do over the phone while I was on my way. So we just sat together on his couch, him complaining about everything, but somehow he still showed he was glad I was there, and we just hung out, cuddled a bit, and he pointed to the group of books on the window ledge.

His new book wasn't in the stores yet, but he had about a dozen advance copies for his friends, and he grabbed one, and started to write in it. He didn't let me read it, just closed the book, and told me it was time for me to leave. Of course a few blocks down the street I had to read the inscription, and tears of course came flooding out, even though my conscious mind wouldn't let me believe this was the last marriage proposal I would get from him. He died a couple of weeks later. I miss him desperately.